Archive for the ‘Michael Jackson’ Category

Paris Hilton and Michael Jackson

February 9, 2007

Hi Grit

Well the British have a view on just about anything. Recently, one of our tabloid newspapers asked their readers which celebrities they considered would make the wierdest couple. Bearing in mind all of the weird UK celebrities that we have, you would have thought that two of these would have topped the list. However, this was not the case.

The popular opinion, based mainly on their plastic looks, was that Paris Hilton and Michael Jackson would be the most unusual coupling between celebrities. Methinks it did not take a high level of intelligence to work that out!

the Brit

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Bat out of hell, bite me world!

January 29, 2007

Hi Brit,

I was in a bit of a nostalgic mood this afternoon, so I put “Bat Out of Hell” on and cranked it up.  Man, what perfect timing!  Global Warming, extremest Muslim terrorists, liberals, Jane Fonda, Britney’s beaver, Big Brother racism, Hillary Clinton, the United Nations, President Bush, AlGore, Iraq, Iran, nuclear bombs, blood in the streets, and the end of the world; screw it all!  So, take a few minutes, put the CD on, crank it up and sing along!

Bat Out Of Hell lyrics

The sirens are screaming and the fires are howling

Way down in the valley tonight
There’s a man in the shadows with a gun in his eye
And a blade shining oh so bright
There’s evil in the air and there’s thunder in the sky
And a killer’s on the bloodshot streets
And down in the tunnel where the deadly are rising
Oh I swear I saw a young boy
Down in the gutter
He was starting to foam in the heat
Oh Baby you’re the only thing in this whole world
that’s pure and good and right
And wherever you are and wherever you go
There’s always gonna be some light
But i gotta get out
I gotta break it out now
Before the final crack of dawn
So we gotta make the most of our one night together
When it’s over you know
We’ll both be so alone
Like a bat out of hell
I’ll be gone when the morning comes
When the night is over
Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone gone gone
Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes
But when the day is done
And the sun goes down
And the moonlight’s shining through

Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven

I’ll come crawling on back to you
I’m gonna hit the highway like a battering ram

On a silver black phantom bike

When the metal is hot and the engine is hungry

And we’re all about to see the light

Nothing ever grows in this rotten old hole

Everything is stunted and lost

And nothing really rocks

And nothing really rolls

And nothing’s ever worth the cost

And I know that I’m damned if I never get out

And maybe I’m damned if I do

But with every other beat I got left in my heart

You know I’d rather be damned with you

If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned

Dancing through the night with you

If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned

Gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned

If Gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned

Dancing through the night

Dancing through the night

Dancing through the night with you
Oh Baby you’re the only thing in this whole world

     that’s pure and good and right

And wherever you are and wherever you go

There’s always gonna be some light

But I gotta get out

I gotta break it out now

Before the final crack of dawn

So we gotta make the most of our one night together

When it’s over you know

We’ll both be so alone

Like a bat out of hell

I’ll be gone when the morning comes

When the night is over

Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone gone gone

Like a bat out of hell I’ll be gone when the morning comes

But when the day is done

And the sun goes down

And the moonlight’s shining through

Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven

I’ll come crawling on back to you

Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven

I’ll come crawling on back to you

I can see myself tearing up the road

Faster than any other boy has ever gone

And my skin is raw but my soul is ripe

And no one’s gonna stop me now

I gotta make my escape

But I can’t stop thinking of you

And I never see the sudden curve until it’s way too late

I never see the sudden curve till it’s way too late

Then I’m dying on the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun

Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike

And I think somebody somewhere is tolling a bell

And the last thing I see is my heart

Still beating

Breaking out of my body

And flying away

Like a bat out of hell

Then I’m dying at the bottom of a pit in the blazing sun

Torn and twisted at the foot of a burning bike

And I think somebody somewhere must be tolling a bell

And the last thing I see is my heart

Still beating

Still beating

Breaking out of my body and flying away

Like a bat out of hell

Thanks Jim; thanks Meat!  Still love it; still a fan.

the Grit

Michael Jackson recovery program

January 10, 2007

jackson.JPGHey Grit

I don’t know if you all over there have noticed the recovery programme that has been set in place by the Jackson family for their favourite son Michael, but we sure have felt the effects in the UK.

First we had brother Tito appearing as a friend of David Gest on the reality TV show “I’m a celebrity – get me out of here.” Of course he could not fail to mention  how much brother Michael was misunderstood and that his love of children was purely platonic. A week or so later Tito then appears as a judge on another reality show, this time “Just the two of us.” This time, complete with a bowler hat and feather, every second sentence was littered with references to his much loved sibling.

Then, a week ago, brother Jermaine popped up in the reality show “Celebrity Big Brother.” His conversation has been littered with comments such as “Michael has a skin pigmentation problem”; “Michael’s actions are misunderstood”; “The world can be so cruel to someone as loving as Michael” and “He’s not broke, just needing to sort out his finances.” 

No-one seems to have mentioned the fact that Michael paid out substantial sums to quiet previous allegations against him, nor that he has sought refuge, first in Bahrain and now in Ireland, nor that his “Never-Neverland” mansion is now standing in ruins.

Is this all just an attempt to restart the gravy train that has funded the Jackson family over the past two decades or so?

the Brit

Jackson: Then four became three

January 4, 2007

Hi Grit

It seems that we have another Jackson brother on show here, this time it is Michael’s brother Tito, complete with a bowler hat.

tito.jpgTito is one of the four judges on a reality “celebrity” TV show being run by the BBC, called “Just the two of us.” Here celebrities perform duets with apparently “famous” singing stars to become the best celebrity duets in the business, as judged by the public.

And Tito’s involvement? I guess the over 50’s need to make a living somehow.

the Brit

Michael Jackson big brother visit

January 4, 2007

jermaine_185.jpgHey Grit

For the next three weeks the Jackson five are reduced to four. Last night Jermaine joined ten other “celebrity” guests in the UK version of the “big brother house.” The show lasts for 25 days, during which time he will be living 24/7 with these other people.

However, from the outset he has some serious problems with this show.

A) He is a vegan. This will be difficult as food is provided based on the majority likes.

B) He doesn’t drink and many of the others do.

C) His greatest fear is sharing a toilet. There is only one small bathroom in the house.

Methinks you are in the wrong place, Jermaine!

His tenure got off to a bad start from the beginning when the only person who recognised him was Dirk Benedict (ex-A Team). Having said that, half of the so-called celebrities I don’t even recognise. Anyway Jermaine has apparently gone into the house to try and get over his shyness. Now how did I know that the £500,000 fee would not be the main tempter?

You can keep up to date with Jermaine’s progress by visiting Channel 4.

the Brit

Animals shafted

December 31, 2006

Hey Grit

Still on the subject of Michael Jackson, Did you see the news of what has happened to his “Never-never land” project. It is now in ruins. (see here for the full story).  Personally, the fact that he has fallen from grace either as a celebrity or financially does not bother me one iota. However, his treatment and disregard for the animals does.

Does he care? Well apparently, according to the news he has not been near the place since the middle of 2005. He is now residing in Ireland. I wonder if he has sleepless nights? As one of his songs on the thriller album says, perhaps that is just “Human Nature.” For me it is not the nicest side of it.

the Brit

The Gloved One Returns!

December 31, 2006

Hi Brit,

Just when you thought it was safe to watch the news, Michael Jackson rears his amazing head.

  Michael Jackson praises James Brown as inspiration

What a hideous thing to do to a dead man.  The moon-walking freak should be glad I’m not related to James Brown, because I’d unleash a pack of lawyers on his scrawny behind for defamation of character. 

the Grit

More signs and portents

December 25, 2006

Hi Brit and merry Christmas,

I hate to mention this on Christmas, but the end of the world is coming.  The signs are too strong today to ignore.  Consider the following:

NORM: Michael Jackson landing on Strip?

In this sad story, we learn that The Gloved One is planning a comeback appearance in Las Vegas.

Katie Rees, the recently de-crowned beauty queen, is from Nevada, the state in which Las Vegas is located.

At the same time, Britney Spears, also known for exposing herself in public,  is planning a comeback show, in, you guessed it, Las Vegas!  Britney Spears Comeback Show in Las Vegas?

Combine this with the death of James Brown, known as the Godfather of soul, and the obvious connection to organized crime which that title implies, and it’s easy to see the link to Las Vegas, since the crime families built the town into what it is today.

So, the end of the world is coming, and it looks like it’s heading for Las Vegas.

Happy New Year,

the Grit