The Church of Britney

Hi Brit,

Funny you should bring up Britney Spears and church, since my usually unreliable source sent me this at lunch:

“There is a new movement, based only on Internet contact, that is seriously disturbing the Powers That Be in many countries, The Church of Holy Britney.  This semi-religious movement is based upon interpreting her song lyrics and public activity in a prophetic light.  Some of the conclusions of the nameless high priests of this “Church” are considered by those in charge to be dangerously subversive and/or a potential danger to the general public.  For instance, the line, “Hit me baby one more time,” has been interpreted as meaning that the US and France, which have each had one revolution, are due another.  Since contact over the Internet is so anonymous, the only ready method of identifying members of this rapidly growing cult is by their act of devotion, as expressed by not wearing underwear.  It is not known at this time if Britney is involved in this, or even knows of its existence.”

Well, I know I’m going to be looking at the other people in the checkout line differently from now on.

the Grit

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2 Responses to “The Church of Britney”

  1. icanplainlysee Says:

    Hi Grit,

    Lmaooo

    Since when was the fact that Britney is the anti-christ obscured?

    Her followers are mounting a global campaign rivaling earth worshippers and the news is spreading fast.

    I always considered you up on the current hip news..?

    Did your source leave a web address for registering with the movement?

    Not that I would, of course, but I may run into someone who would..

    Ahem.

  2. britandgrit Says:

    Hi i,

    Actually, my sources are split on the identity of the anti-Christ. At the moment, the first place list is: Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and several people who have the first name “Dick.”

    As to joining the Britney movement, I have it on not so good information that you should write your email address on your shorts and fly them on your car’s radio antenna while you drive slowly around any major city. You will be contacted.

    the Grit

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